


Love the One You're With

by MaroonCamaro



Category: The Walking Dead & Related Fandoms, The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Because Rick, But he won't admit it, Daryl wants Jesus, I don't know, Jesus wants Daryl, M/M, Maybe - Freeform, Temporarily Unrequited Love, don't hate me, please
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-04
Updated: 2019-06-04
Packaged: 2020-04-07 14:30:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19086961
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaroonCamaro/pseuds/MaroonCamaro
Summary: Daryl loves Rick. Everyone knows it. But, Rick loves Michonne. Daryl's cool with that. Rick's happy, right? That's good enough for Daryl. But Jesus isn't cool with it. Daryl deserves to have someone love him the way he needs to be loved. And Jesus is just the man for the job.





	Love the One You're With

**Author's Note:**

  * For [JeromeSankara](https://archiveofourown.org/users/JeromeSankara/gifts).



> This is a gift for my friend JeromeSankara. It's not even his birthday! Jer works hard everyday and lives and breaths Norman ( I mean, can't blame the guy), so I thought he needed a fic just for him. 
> 
> I've never written Daryl with anyone other than Rick, so this is new territory for me, please be kind! Thank you to my buddies katytheinspiredworkaholic and TWDobsessive for the beta reads and feedback. A good beta is priceless.
> 
> Any mistakes you see are mine as I made changes after they read. 
> 
> Fair warning, this is a Walking Dead fic, so things that happen in the show can happen in this fic. I hate giving away the story in my notes, but I don't want anyone yelling at me. 
> 
> Hope you like it, Jer!

Daryl barely flinched as the blood from another walker splashed across his face. There was a time when he used to keep count, wondered about the life of the person who just got put down; now it wasn’t worth the effort. Just another walking dead that needed put down permanently. Who they were or how many he’d taken out that day no longer even crossed his mind.  

He looked over to where Jesus was roundhouse kicking another walker’s head, black blood spraying in a wide arch. This one looked like it used to be a teenager based upon the worn out sneakers and ratty hoodie it was wearing. Daryl blinked and looked away, checking for any stragglers.

They were escorting a load of vegetables from Hilltop to Sanctuary when they’d come across the dead. The herd of walkers had been small, less than a dozen, so it was just a matter of minutes until they were all lying on the ground. It took them longer to clear the bodies out of the way. 

They worked well together, him and Jesus. Just a nod of the head and a flick of the wrist and whole conversations were said. Jesus did talk more than Daryl, but that was okay because then Daryl could get away with grunts and head bobs. Jesus understood him fine. 

Just like Rick did. 

Pushing that thought to the back of his mind, Daryl got back on his bike and started it, Jesus hopped on behind him and then they were off again. It was slow going. They were still on the lookout for any stray dead, but Daryl was also trying to stay within shouting distance of the cart and to conserve fuel. What with the corn harvest being shit again this year with half of it rotting before they could harvest and most of the rest barely producing anything worth eating and then having to share what ethanol they could make between the four communities, there wasn’t much to go around. At least the bike could go forever on just five gallons.

The sentry on duty at the Sanctuary let Daryl in without a challenge. They all knew him on sight. Not that Daryl knew who the guy was; just another Negan wantabe that bitched behind Daryl’s back.  

Jesus hopped off as soon as Daryl got around to the side of the building where he kept his bike. It was right under his room, so he could hear if anyone messed with it in the night. They’d tried a couple of times in the beginning, but looking up to see Daryl’s crossbolt pointed at their heads quickly changed their minds. They knew he didn’t do warning shots and he never missed. 

“I’m just gonna take a leak and head back to Hilltop,” Jesus said, his arms crossed and his head tilted to the side.

“Don’t need my permission. Piss wherever ya want.”

Jesus looked at Daryl a moment longer before sighing and turning away. Daryl shook his head and sighed himself. He’d have to go check on Eugene and then make sure nobody’d slacked off while he was gone. Actually, he knew they’d slacked off, he just had to holler at them for it.

He got his bike situated and then headed into the building, steeling himself for the confrontation he knew was coming. The tension was thick in the air as soon as he walked into the big open space. People were standing around with their fists clenched and bodies tight, ready to spring into action.

“What’s going on?” Daryl yelled. “Ain’t you all got shit to do?”

“Tell your little bitch boy that we don’t take orders from him,” said one of the men. He was taller than Daryl and bigger around. Daryl couldn’t remember his name, but he was one of them that Daryl would have gladly shot between the eyes. 

“For the love of god, it wasn’t an order. I only asked if you had new latrines dug.” Jesus was standing in the middle of the crowd. His stance looked relaxed, but Daryl knew that was a trick. Jesus could turn into a tornado of fists and feet in a flash and have everyone within arm’s length on the floor if he wanted. The big guy wouldn’t stand a chance.

“We do. They’re out back by the big tank on the west side of the building,” Daryl told him. “Everybody else get back to work.” He despised having to deal with these people. They were all feral dogs needing to be put down. But Rick thought they needed them. So here they were, and here Daryl had to be to keep them toeing the line.

Daryl fucking hated it.

It was just him and Eugene against all these assholes day in and day out. They were all just waiting for an excuse to blow up. It was worse than working the toddler room at nap time.

He glared at the big guy until, with a snarl and a curl of his lip, he turned away, hopefully back to doing whatever he was supposed to be doing. Daryl scanned the room and watched as everyone reluctantly slunk back to work. You’d think they’d appreciate that Daryl hadn’t burned anyone’s face off yet, but apparently they were a bunch of  sadomasochists  that got off on that sort of thing.  

Daryl headed to where Eugene was working at the still. It almost seemed sad to waste good corn liquor on fueling the vehicles they had left, but then Daryl would remember the last time he got drunk on moonshine and push thoughts of getting wasted out of his mind.

“How’s it going?” he asked Eugene.

“Production’s dove off the springboard like a horse at a carnival looking for a baby pool.”

“Can we start fermentin’ the corn stalks too?” Daryl asked as he mentally figured up how many pints had dripped into the bucket Eugene had sitting under the copper pipe. 

Eugene's mouth fell open. “I was not aware that hooch could be derived from spent stalks.”

Daryl held back a smirk, “You ain't ever been poor and desperate before. I mean, before now.”

“I can confirm that before this whole hog destruction of life as we had blissfully known before now, I did not want in a way that would necessitate turning spent corn stalks into go juice,” Eugene said with a solemn nod.

“Count yourself lucky,” Daryl said as he turned away, headed towards his room to clean up and maybe get a bite to eat.

He ignored the dark looks and low murmurs he received from the Saviors as he went up the steel steps to his room. He paused as he saw another one of the scantily clad women standing on the landing by his door. “Done told ya, I ain’t interested.”

“Look, I know you said you aren’t  _ interested _ , but what red blooded man ever turned down a bj?” She was cute, Daryl would give her that, standing there with her pageant smile and artfully ruffled hair. But she was skin and bones and clearly needed a good meal. “I..I can’t go out there...with the dead. I’m not brave enough.”

“No one said ya gotta. Just got to do your share. You can cook or mend or stand watch, I don’t give a shit. But you ain’t getting out of work by sucking my dick.” Daryl shoved past her and unlocked his door.

“What is your problem, are you gay or something?”

Daryl paused and turned to look at her, “I ain’t gotta be gay to turn down a blowjob. I ain’t fuckin’ Bill Clinton or Negan. Go on and find something to do and leave me be or I’ll have Eugene schedule ya for the next run to Hilltop.”

He ignored her whispered “Fag” as she ran off. It wasn’t the first time he’d turned down one of the women who’d had to use their body with Negan to get by. You’d think they’d be happy. When Daryl was here as a captive, they didn’t look like they wanted to be Negan’s “wives”.

His room looked undisturbed, thankfully. He looked out the window to double check on his bike before flopping down on his bed. Staring at the ceiling, counting the holes in the tiles was what he usually did, but he needed to clean up. He was still covered in walker gack and really didn’t want to start stinking of it.  

There was a sink in his room, it must have been a lab or something before, so he made use of it to take a whore’s bath. One of the perks of the Sanctuary was the water towers on the roof. As long as the rains were regular, they had water. Just needed to boil it to make it drinkable, otherwise it was fine. 

A knock at his door interrupted his bath. “What?” Daryl called out gruffly, hoping it wasn’t one of the women coming back.

“It’s Jesus. Can I come in?”

Daryl swore and dropped his head. “Hold on a minute.”

Quickly rubbing a towel over his shoulders and torso, Daryl gave up on washing. He nabbed a cleaner shirt off a peg on the wall and slipped it on and had it halfway buttoned up before he opened the door to let Jesus in. “What’s up?”

Jesus’ eyes swept over Daryl before answering, “Just wanted to stop by before I headed back to Hilltop. To see if you have any requests.”

Daryl ignored Jesus’ appraising look. “No. Unless you got some people that actually do their damn job without bitchin’.”

“Actually, we do. But I don’t think I can convince Maggie to part with them,” Jesus said with a sheepish grin.

“Yeah, she wouldn’t,” Daryl agreed. He looked down at his bloodstained pants and sighed. He wouldn’t get a chance to change now. Pushing past Jesus, he didn’t wait to see if he was followed or not. 

He soon threw himself into the operations of Sanctuary and lost sight of Jesus. 

***

“So, how many of the Saviors will be available to help take out the herd coming from the west?” Maggie was looking at a map that had been folded and unfolded so much it was starting to come apart along the creases. Marks of all different colors dotted over the original greens, browns, and blues denoting the other communities and past herds.

“As many as Daryl can get to do a bit of hard work. They like killing, so chances are good.” Jesus was standing in the doorway, his arms crossed. He was ready to go, it had been almost a month since he’d last seen Daryl. This herd hadn’t been turned away with the usual controlled explosions that worked in the past. Too many this time. 

Maggie shook her head, “I just wish we didn’t have to waste resources and put people in danger. We’re going to need to find a better long term solution for keeping the dead away.”

“As much as I think that is a great idea, I just can’t see how we could pull it off with the growing number of the dead walking around.”

“At some point, they are just going to start falling apart.” Maggie looked up from her map, “And there will be less people turning now that everyone knows how to prevent it.”

Jesus shook his head, “Maggie, that could be years or decades from now. The world belongs to the dead and we’re just playing a game of hide and seek from them at this point.”

“I know it,” Maggie said with a nod of her head, “but we’ve got to try.”

“I’ll support you, whatever you come up with,” Jesus said.

Maggie looked back to her map, “Thank you. You headed to Sanctuary soon?”

“Leaving as soon as we’re done here.”

She glanced up, “Be safe. Watch out for walkers that have broken off from the main herd.”

Jesus snorted and turned to leave the room, “I always am,” he said over his shoulder as he headed down the hall.

Daryl was working outside of Sanctuary when Jesus got there. He hadn’t been noticed yet, so Jesus stood back under a tree and watched for a moment. It wouldn’t be long until Daryl sensed he was being scrutinized, so Jesus looked his fill while he could. 

There was a small group of people that Daryl was leading through cutting down trees. He didn’t shy away from jumping in and helping to load the logs onto the cart that already had a few on it. When Daryl stopped to mop the sweat out of his eyes with a bandana he caught sight of Jesus watching from beneath the tree.

Once he knew he’d been spotted, Jesus pushed off from the tree and swaggered to where Daryl stood waiting. 

“Come to help?” Daryl asked in his gruff voice when Jesus got close. The sweat was pouring down his face and making his hair slick to his scalp, Jesus tried to keep his eyes from roaming to the shirt that was plastered to Daryl’s chest. 

“Sure,” Jesus bent without pause to help Daryl load a log onto the cart.

The sun was just going down when the cart was full enough to go back to Sanctuary. Daryl called it a day and sent everyone ahead.

After retrieving his bike, Daryl offered for Jesus to hop on the back. Grateful, Jesus did and held on tight to Daryl as they sped down the road and past the cart and the rest of the folks from the Sanctuary. Daryl didn’t seem to notice, or care, the middle fingers some of the men gave the two as they road past and kicked up dust. 

Daryl smelled like honest sweat and pine and Jesus just barely kept himself from burying his nose into the back of Daryl’s neck and taking a deep breath. He held on as tightly as he thought he could get away with, not minding that Daryl’s sweat soaked hair whipped him in the face.

When they got back, people were lining up for dinner. “You want something?” Daryl asked.

“No, I’m...good,” Jesus answered. He actually would like a bite, but noting the hostile looks around him, he decided to rely on the food in his pack. He wouldn’t mention that most of the food the Saviors were eating came from Hilltop and Jesus had a hand in growing and harvesting it.

“You gonna bunk here tonight?” Daryl asked as he put a potato on his plate. Jesus had followed him through the line, but hadn’t grabbed a plate.

Jesus shrugged, “I could. But I’m comfortable making my way back in the dark. I’ve spent many a night outside the walls.”

“Can’t let ya do that.” Jesus had already told Daryl about the herd on the way to Sanctuary and Daryl had pledged a dozen Saviors. “Not until that herd passes.”

“Worried about me?”

Daryl stopped in the middle of the floor and turned to look at Jesus, “Maggie’d hand me my balls on a platter if you got killed.”

Jesus snorted, “That she would.” He motioned for Daryl to continue to a table, “You’ve convinced me, I’ll stay the night.”

“Good.”

The mood in the room was still very unfriendly. Jesus could feel almost every eye in the large room on the table where he and Daryl sat. He tried not to be obvious as he looked around, but luckily everyone seemed more intent on grumbling than actually doing anything.

“How do you do it?”

Daryl didn’t pause eating as he answered Jesus between bites, “Do what?”

“Deal with all those people that clearly don’t like you being here.” Jesus looked around the room again, taking note of who’s eyes skittered away instead of meeting his and who looked at him boldly.

Shrugging, Daryl answered, “They ain’t got a choice, and ain’t one of them that I can’t beat their ass.”

Jesus snorted, “I suppose so.”

“C’mon, I’ll show ya where you can sleep tonight,” Daryl said as he abruptly stood up and pushed back from the table.

The room Daryl showed him to was small, with a single bed, a small dresser, and a shelf on the wall. 

“Ain’t much, but the door locks and you don’t have to worry about anyone coming in on ya,” Daryl said as he leaned against the doorframe. 

“I’ve slept in worse spots.”

“Yeah, me too.” Daryl stood up and turned to go, “I’ll see ya in the mornin’.”

“Wait,” Jesus tried not to sound desperate, “You don’t have to run off. Might be nice to talk to someone friendly for the evening.”

Daryl blinked and turned to look at Jesus closely. His eyes flitted down and then back up his lanky form. Jesus’ breath caught, but his half formed hopes were dashed. “Thanks, but I best be going. Got walkers to take down tomorrow.”

Jesus’ smile faltered, but didn’t fade completely away. “Sure. But, the offer stands.”

Biting his lip, Daryl nodded and turned away.

“Fuck,” Jesus breathed out. At least Daryl had only politely refused. Maybe there was still a chance.

***

Jesus woke the next morning to the hubbub of the Sanctuary coming to life and getting ready for the day. He’d only taken his shoes off to sleep, so all he had to do was lace up his boots to be ready. No one had bothered him, and he’d slept well, even if thoughts of Daryl skittered through his mind all night.

People were up and about getting breakfast or just standing in groups talking when Jesus made it out to the main floor. He didn’t see Daryl anywhere, so he grabbed an apple and headed out the front, ignoring the glares he got when he bit into it.

There were more people milling about in the yard, talking in small groups or just standing around being useless. But it helped him find Daryl who was standing next to his bike, looking ready to go out. Jesus made his way over to him.

“Didn’t think you’d be up before me,” Jesus said cheerfully.

“These assholes like to pretend they got issues so they can wake me up at the ass crack of dawn every morning.” Daryl didn’t even try to keep his voice down, anyone within earshot could hear him.

Jesus crossed his arms and stood with his legs slightly spread. “So, Maggie is expecting the herd to be coming down B route in the next couple of days. She’d like to catch them before they get there.”

Daryl glanced up at him, “Let’s go look and see what we’re dealing with.” He turned back to his bike and started it up, “Hop on.”

Not willing to turn down a ride with Daryl, Jesus jumped on the back of the bike and snuggled in as close as he thought he could get away with. Daryl smelled clean today, he obviously had bathed. Jesus let that image linger as Daryl put the bike in gear and then they were off. 

They rode for over an hour before they started seeing stray walkers on and near the road. Normally they would stop and take care of them, but that wasn’t the mission today. Tomorrow or the next day they planned to come prepared to take out as many as possible and maybe find a way to turn them away from the communities.

Daryl easily wove around any dead that were on the road, but soon they were getting too thick for Jesus to feel comfortable. He squeezed Daryl’s midsection and leaned in to yell in his ear, “They’re too thick, we should turn back.”

Grunting his agreement, Daryl turned the bike in a tight arch. Jesus had to fend off a walker that got in their way and fell into the bike, but they were safe after that. Once they were in the clear, Daryl turned off the paved road onto a dirt path that went off into the woods. It led up a small hill and then to a clearing so they could look back at the herd.

Jesus got off the bike first. He pulled out his binoculars and trained them on the mass of dead. “Looks like we might have to get more than the Saviors involved. It’s not the biggest herd we’ve dealt with, but it’s pretty large.”

Daryl took the binoculars from Jesus and looked himself. “We’ll have to see if we can get Alexandria involved,” he said.

“Not sure Maggie would like that,” Jesus said with a cock of his head

“She sure as shit wouldn’t like this herd knocking at her door,” Daryl said as he handed the binoculars back to Jesus.

“Maybe Rosita can set up some explosives.”

“Maybe,” Daryl said as he got back on the bike. “C’mon. I can drop you off on the road to Alexandria.”

“You don’t want to go with me?”

“Nah, waste ‘a gas.”

“Right, what was I thinking,” Jesus said, his voice sarcastic and light.

Daryl rode them back down the dirt track to the asphalt road. It was still a long ride to where Daryl would drop Jesus off, so Jesus settled into Daryl’s warm back and kept his eyes open for any stray walkers that might jump out at them. The ride was uneventful until there was a strange noise that came from beneath Jesus’ seat.

“Fuck,” Daryl cursed as he slowed the bike down.

Jesus jumped off before the bike stopped and scanned the area, but they seemed to be alone. There were several houses in the area, but they looked like they’d already been ransacked with doors off hinges and windows broken. Little chance of any dead hanging out waiting to be woken up. Hopefully if Daryl needed anything to fix the bike, it could still be found in one of the houses.

Daryl bent down and poked around on the motorcycle and cursed again. “Looks like the chain is busted.”

“Can you fix it?” Jesus asked and then immediately held up his hands in surrender when Daryl gave him a fierce look.

“I built the damn thing,” he snarled.

“Of course. My apologies.” Jesus stepped back and looked around again, hoping one of the houses would clue him in on which one had a chain or the means to repair one.

Daryl pulled out a couple of tools from somewhere and started working on the chain. Another loud clink and Daryl stood up. “Can’t fix it without some extra links. We’ll have to see if I can find something to work or we’ll have to start walkin’.”

“There’s plenty of house here to search through,” Jesus said, gesturing around them.

“Yeah, I’ll start over here, and you do the other side of the road. You know what you’re looking for?”

“Near enough.”

“‘K, holler if you find something.”

They split up and started searching the houses. At one point there was a loud crash from Daryl’s side of the road, but Daryl quickly hollered out that he was good. 

Jesus thought he’d hit upon a good place, with a garage full of tools and car and engine parts strewn about, but it seems the previous owner did not work on bikes. There was nothing even resembling a bike part anywhere, and certainly not a chain.

He was on his fifth house when he heard Daryl whistle. Jesus was instantly on the alert. Daryl would have called out again if there wasn’t any danger. Careful not to make any noise, Jesus ducked down and made his way to the window in the house he had just entered. 

Outside he could see a small pack of walkers shuffling down the middle of the street. It wasn’t too many for them to take out. He looked around for Daryl and found him hiding between two houses diagonal from the house Jesus was in. He motioned to Daryl that he was ready, but Daryl gave a short shake of his head and motioned to the back of the herd.

There were a few more than a small pack. Not a full scale herd, but more than enough to make them decided to wait it out. Sighing in frustration, Jesus careful worked his way out of the front room and up the steps to the second floor. He’d skipped it earlier, but now that he was here he double check to make sure it was empty.

Once satisfied he was alone, Jesus made his way to the front bedroom so that he could have a better vantage point to watch, and to be out of the way if a stray walker made it into the house. Daryl had moved from his hiding spot and Jesus figured he’d gone to a better lookout point too.

Jesus settled in and must have dozed off because the next thing he knew, the light was slanting hard through the window and the herd looked to have moved on. He had a crick in his neck that he worked out as he made his way out of the house in search of Daryl.

***

Daryl looked down at his bike and sighed. The chain breaking was bad enough, but now it had been toppled over and banged up from the walker herd. He could have already been back to Sanctuary and eating dinner if it wasn’t for all those damn dead, even with the busted chain. He was pretty sure he’d just found a garage of a bike owner when he’d had to hide out. He would have loved to at least spend the time looking for a chain, but he didn’t want to risk making noise and then have a garage full of walkers to deal with.

Jesus came sauntering out of a house across the way, looking all the world like a house cat that had just woken from a midday nap. Daryl snorted and looked back down at his bike. Knowing Jesus, that’s exactly what had happened. 

Glancing up at a stray walker that was coming down the street, Daryl reached for his knife at his hip. But Jesus noticed it at about the same time and casually strode down the street and did some complicated kick that spun Jesus around and left the walker with a smashed in head. Typical. Daryl shook his head and went back to deciding what parts he would need to get the bike going..

The garage had all he needed, but the light was fading fast. It wouldn’t take long to fix his bike, but Daryl wasn’t excited about going back in the dark. Especially with that herd somewhere ahead of them. Sighing softly, he pushed the bike into the garage and carefully closed the door. 

Inside, Jesus was already rummaging through the kitchen, fruitlessly searching for food or anything else they could scavenge. Daryl left him to it and went around and secured the house as much as he could with what was on hand. Couches in front of doors, tables propped against windows, anything to impede an interloper long enough for he and Jesus to respond. When he got back to the kitchen, Jesus had laid out a small meal of vegetables and dried meat. Daryl added a canteen of water, and they had their dinner.

“I’ll take first watch,” Jesus said, clearing the counter where they’d taken their meal.

“Nah,” Daryl said with a shake of his head, “I do better staying up late. There’s a bedroom at the top of the steps.” He didn’t wait to see if Jesus agreed before heading to the front room and taking up post in front of a window that was only partially blocked by a table. He could just hear Jesus head up the steps as he settled in for his watch.

The next morning when Daryl woke, it was with a headache and a growling stomach. Jesus had woken easily enough when Daryl had poked him somewhere around 2 a.m. and they switched places.  Daryl had gotten over freaking out waking up in a strange place long ago. Once he wiped the grit from his eyes, he headed downstairs to see if Jesus made it through the night.

Daryl soon found him out in front of the house. His shirt was off and his hair pulled back in his usual man-bun and he was going through some sort of set of movements that reminded Daryl of what he’d seen old people in China do. Jesus’s back was to Daryl, so Daryl tried not to disturb him.

The light made Jesus look even brighter than usual. His hair glowed and the skin on his back dappled with sunlight as he moved. Daryl’s mouth went dry. 

“I don’t want to insult you by telling you I heard you coming, but I heard you coming,” Jesus said without breaking his movements.

“Didn’t know you’d be out here practicing for the ballet,” Daryl said gruffly to hide his embarrassment. “I’m gonna get started on the bike, maybe we can be out of here in an hour or so.” 

Jesus finally dropped out of his one legged stance and turned to look at Daryl. “Do you need any help?” he asked,crossing his arms and tilting his head.

Daryl swallowed hard and kept his eyes on Jesus’ face and didn’t let his gaze travel down the smooth chest and on to where it Ved into low slung cargo pants. “Nah, just...just keep an eye out and maybe see if there’s anything worth taking back.”

Smiling, Jesus gave Daryl a mock salute, “Aye, aye Cap’n.”

Shaking his head, Daryl went to the garage to work on his bike. He was going to get out of here, and away from Jesus as soon as he could.

****

The ride to Alexandria started out mostly ass clenchingly scary as they got underway, enough walkers were on the road that Jesus could have reached out and touched them, but Daryl drove around them and only slowing enough for Jesus to kick any that got too close.  It got less tense the closer they got to town, the walkers dwindling to nothing several miles out of Alexandria. Jesus kept waiting for Daryl to pull over and dump him off the bike the closer they got, but Daryl didn’t. He just kept going like he was taking Jesus to the front gate all along.

They rode straight to Aaron’s house. “Gonna look and see if he’s got a kickstand,” Daryl said as he leaned the bike against the front steps. Jesus hadn’t even noticed it was missing, but then again, he didn’t know much about motorcycles.  

“I’ll see if I can find Rick,” Jesus said. 

Daryl paused on his way up the steps, “He’ll be headed to lunch,” he said without turning around.

Jesus dipped his head in thanks, not that Daryl could see, and headed to Rick’s house that he shared with Michonne and Judith. It wasn’t the largest house in Alexandria, but was certainly the most important. 

Rick was standing outside his house, hand on his hip, near his gun, as he talked to one of the citizens of Alexandria. Jesus didn’t know the other man’s name, but it didn’t matter because the man left as Jesus made his way to Rick.

“Hey Jesus,” Rick said in his sweet southern drawl.

Jesus inclined his head in greeting, “Rick.”

He had Rick’s full attention then, and Jesus could feel the charisma pouring over him like a warm shower after a cold day. “Everything alright at Hilltop?” Rick asked him.

“Yes and no. Hilltop is fine for now, but there’s a large herd heading toward us and, unfortunately, it looks like more than we can handle on our own.”

Rick gave a short nod of his head, “You need help.”

“It looks that way. Daryl and I scouted it yesterday and it looks like the largest herd we’ve ever seen. Not sure even explosives will turn it.”

“Daryl’s with you?”

Jesus held back a smile, of course Rick would focus on that. “Yeah, he stopped at Aaron’s house to get a part for his bike. We got caught up in the herd and it got damaged.” 

Rick’s whole body swivelled towards Aaron’s house. Jesus wasn’t even sure Rick did it consciously. He was staring at Aaron’s house now, most likely trying to will Daryl out.

“So, I was thinking, if we all put our heads together, maybe we can figure out how to turn this herd back the way it came at least.”

“Yeah,” Rick said, still distracted by what was just out of reach.

“Jesus!”

Turning, he could see Michonne striding their way, a thousand watt smile painted across her face.

“Michonne, so good to see you!” They exchanged a brief hug.

“What brings you our way?” She asked as she linked arms with Rick. Rick in turn looked down at her and smiled fondly.

“There’s a big herd headed our way. I’ve already talked to Daryl and he’s willing to share some resources, but I’m not sure it will be enough. I was hoping we could get some help from Alexandria as well.”

“We’ll have to bring it up with the council, but it is in our best interest to help keep Hilltop safe,” she said.

“With a coordinated effort, I think we could do this,” Rick said. “I’d like to see this herd myself. Where did you say there were exactly?”

“I didn’t, but they are headed towards route B. If they stay on that route they could be knocking on our door by next week.” Jesus crossed his arms and looked towards Aaron’s house. Daryl was taking his sweet time.

Rick blew out a breath. “We can bring it up at the meeting this afternoon. You can stick around and plead your case if you want.”

“Thank you. If you’ll excuse me, I’d like to stop by and see Aaron and see how Gracie is doing.” 

Michonne smiled brightly again, “Growing like a weed. Just like Judith.” She turned to Rick, "C'mon, school will be over soon. I'm sure you want to be there when Judith gets done." She looked back at Jesus with a smirk. "She insists she's big enough now. I couldn't convince her that daycare was like preschool." 

Jesus had no more than turned towards Aaron’s house when Daryl finally stepped out. He had something shiny in his hand, no doubt the part he’d been after, and he was bidding Aaron farewell. But he didn’t stay to talk long, making a beeline for where Jesus, Rick, and Michonne were standing. Jesus had no expectation that Daryl was looking for him. Not with Rick standing right next to him.

Biting back his regret, Jesus nodded his farewell to Rick and Michonne and headed across the way to Aaron’s house. Aaron waved to him, so Jesus had a good excuse to keep his acknowledgement of Daryl as they passed each other to a brief meeting of the eyes. Jesus was surprised he even got that.

“Jesus! How’re you doing?” Aaron greeted him with a warm hug and a bright smile.

“I’m good! How are you and Gracie?” 

Aaron tilted his head and smiled fondly, “She’s growing by leaps and bounds. Now I know why my mom always threatened to put a rock on my head to keep me from growing.”

“That bad, is it?” Jesus asked. His eyes drifted around Aaron and tracked Rick and Daryl’s movements as they walked away, their heads close together.

“She’ll be finished growing her third arm by the end of the week.” Aaron said lightly.

“Hm, oh that’s nice.” Daryl and Rick were turning a corner and walking out of Jesus’ line of sight.

“Jesus?”

Giving up hope of watching the two leaders anymore, Jesus turned his attention back to Aaron. “Sorry, you said she’s grown another foot already?”

Aaron chuckled, “No, I said she’s grown another arm. But you weren’t paying attention.”

Jesus hoped his embarrassment didn’t turn his face red. “Sorry, I uh…”

“You don’t have to try and hide your feelings from me.” Aaron looked over his shoulder to where Rick and Daryl had been. “But you must know, it won’t ever happen.”

He could deny it, but the lie would just insult Aaron. “I know, I know,” he sighed. Gripping the railing on the porch, Jesus finally said out loud what he’d been holding inside for too long, “I can’t help it. He’s just crying out for someone to care for him and I do that for him, but he’s so loyal to Rick he doesn’t even notice.”

Aaron snorted and put his hip on the railing next to Jesus, “Daryl isn’t just loyal to Rick. He’s devoted to him. Heart, mind, and body. I doubt he even really knows how deeply he’s in love with Rick.”

“They are both idiots. Anyone who is around the two of them for more than five minutes can see it.”

“Just because the dead walk and we’re falling backwards in society, doesn’t mean that internalized homophobia has gone away,” Aaron said with a shake of his head.

Jesus’ eyes darted to Aaron, “I’ve never felt like they’ve treated me any differently, have you?”

Aaron shook his head, “No, not like that. I mean, they just can’t acknowledge that they might actually love each other romantically instead of just as brothers and best friends. Well, maybe Daryl has, and maybe that’s why he stays away now.”

“Fucking tragic,” Jesus said, his voice just a touch angry.

“You do have yourself in a pickle, don’t you. In love with a man that’s in love with another man who is in love with a woman.”

Jesus’ head dipped down to lay on the railing, his hands covering it protectively, “I’m an idiot.”

“Maybe, but you’re not the only one.”

Jesus peeked out from under his hands, “Don’t tell me you’re tragically in love with Rick too?”

“Hell no! I mean, Daryl is in love with Rick, and he knows nothing will ever come of it. And he’s made his peace with it.”

Standing up, Jesus crossed his arms, “I don’t think that I could live like that. Not for long anyway. Why devote yourself to someone that isn’t going to love you back the same way?” 

Aaron shrugged a shoulder, “I have no idea. Those two have been through a lot together and they have a pretty tight bond. Who’s to say they haven’t talked about it and come to an understanding?”

“Are you really saying they had a heart to heart and Daryl confessed his love and Rick said, “thanks but, no thanks’?”

“Oh, hell no. Nothing that direct. I’m sure that Rick acknowledged Daryl’s feelings in some way, but made it clear he wasn’t romantically in love.”

“And Daryl just accepted it and still follows Rick around like a devoted dog.”

Aaron shrugged again, “Something like that.”

“Shakespeare would be impressed.” Jesus looked out over the town, hoping to get a glimpse of Daryl again.

“You don’t say?” Aaron said, voice thick with sarcasm.

Jesus looked back at Aaron sheepishly, “Touche.” 

“C’mon, you must be hungry. I’ve got lunch going and you’ll need your strength for the council meeting.”

“Thanks, I’m hoping that since I have Rick and Michonne on board already, they can do most of the convincing.”

Aaron held the door open for Jesus, “Well, should be an easy meeting then. Are you planning on going back to Hilltop after then?”

Jesus was no fool, he could hear the invitation as clearly as if Aaron had written it on a billboard. “No, no I don’t have to go back tonight. Might be better if I bunked here and went back in the morning.”

Aaron smiled, “Great. You can help cook dinner too.”

***

Daryl readjusted his shoulder against the back wall of the church. They were in the middle of the council meeting and some of these people could give Merle a run for his money with how much they talked. Over an hour on how best to distribute corn so far. Daryl was sure they were fighting over it so much due to his presence. They didn’t want to share with Sanctuary and did not care that the ground there was shit and they couldn’t grow anything.  

He was only still there because the council hadn’t gotten to the herd marching towards Hilltop. It should have been the first damn thing, but Rick had wanted to save it for last. None of these fuckers had even put two and two together to wonder why he and Jesus were both in Alexandria at the same time. 

Looking wistfully at the door, Daryl caught sight of Jesus standing in the corner, arms crossed and listening to the meeting. Most of the corn came from Hilltop, so Alexandria should be deferring to him. But of course they weren’t.

“I just don’t see why we have to share with them. It’s not like they deserve it!” some old bat was standing up and complaining. She probably hadn’t stepped foot outside the walls in years.

Daryl did not want to hear anymore about corn, “Look, I’ll be the first to admit they don’t pull their weight as much as everyone else, but we’re gonna need ‘em to take on this herd headed our way.”

Everyone in the building turned shocked eyes on Daryl. “Yeah, a big ass herd is headed towards Hilltop and we got less than a week to turn ‘em. Ya’ll can sit here and bitch about who deserves what, but Hilltop is where most of the corn is grown and if you wanna be able to sit here next week and bitch, you best worry about that instead.”

Rick stood up as the crowd exploded into questions and accusations, mostly flung at Daryl.

“Enough!” Michonne yelled over the din.

Rick remained standing, “Now, I wanted to bring this up at the end of the meeting, but Daryl is right. There’s a herd headed down route B. It’ll probably get to Hilltop before the week’s out. I’m planning on going out and looking at it with Daryl and Jesus tomorrow.” Rick held up his hand as the crowd started to murmur again, “I trust Daryl and Jesus when they say it’s a big one, but if it looks like we can sit this one out, we will.”

Daryl shared a look with Jesus, but didn’t add anything to what Rick had said. The herd was probably the biggest they’d ever seen. Rick could try and deflect how serious it was, but in the end, Alexandria would have to pitch in and help.

He didn’t feel like sitting around listening to everyone whine and ask dumbass questions, so Daryl left as soon as he could. Rick didn’t even notice, but apparently Jesus did because he soon joined Daryl as he walked across the road towards Rick’s place. Daryl always stayed there while he was stuck in town.

“Do you think they’ll come around?” Jesus asked.

“Ain’t got a choice. ‘Sides, the people that are bitchin’ the most probably haven’t been outside since Rick showed up. They’re just worried if Alexandria loses some people that they’d have to do their fair share.”

Jesus smiled ruefully, “Not sure that’s an accurate statement. There’s plenty of work to do in a place like Alexandria that doesn’t involve going outside the walls.”

“As far as I can tell, it’s just complainin’.” Daryl climbed the steps to Rick and Michonne’s place. A woman Daryl barely recognized inclined her head towards him, but didn’t move from where she was sitting at a table. Little Judith was was sitting beside her on the porch drawing a picture. She looked up at him and smiled.

“Uncle Daryl!” She squealed and jumped up and ran into his arms.

“Hey little asskicker. What’cha doing today?” 

She pulled away and grabbed his hand, pulling him to the drawing she was making. “See, it’s mommy and daddy and Carl and me!”

Daryl bit his lip as he looked at the stick figures on the paper. Rick, Michonne, and Carl all had bigger than life heads and Judith’s self portrait had yellow ringlets stuck out at all angles around her own head. 

“See, there’s daddy and mommy and Carl. Mommy told me what he looks like. I can’t ‘member.”

Daryl nodded his head, “It looks just like him. You did a good job.” 

“Oh! I can draw you too! There’s room right here!” She pointed to a space next to Rick’s picture.

“Nah, that’s ok. It looks better without me.”

Judith tilted his head and looked at him speculatively, “I can draw you with Jesus!”

Daryl looked back over his shoulder where Jesus was standing. “I think that would be a good idea. Jesus can take it with him when he goes back to Hilltop.”

Judith clapped her hands and then set about making a new picture. Daryl watched for a moment as she drew a huge circle for his head and then added his stick limbs. He couldn’t contain a chuckle as she drew hair all over where his face would be instead of putting in eyes.

Jesus leaned over and looked at Judith’s handiwork, “I think that’s an excellent likeness of Daryl.”

She looked up at him in confusion, so Daryl translated, “He said it looks jus’ like me.”

Judith giggled and went back to drawing. Daryl’s eyes drifted back over to the original drawing, lingering over Carl’s likeness before sighing softly and backing up. “I’m gonna go get cleaned up for dinner. Ok?”

“Ok,” she said cherrily, her legs swinging as she drew.

“I best be on my way too,” Jesus said, more to Daryl than Judith.

“Come back so you can get your picture!” Judith told him.

“Yes ma’am. I’ll stop by before I leave tomorrow,” Jesus assured her. He nodded his head at Judith’s babysitter and turned to go.

‘Hey,” Daryl called after him. “Where you staying tonight?”

Jesus stopped at the bottom of the steps and turned to quirk an eyebrow at Daryl, “At Aaron’s.”

“Oh, yeah. I guess that makes sense.”

Narrowing his eyes, Jesus asked, “How does that make sense?”

Glancing back at the sitter, Daryl shrugged, “Nothin’ just, ya’ll seem friendly.”

“We  _ are  _ friendly. Which is why he’s invited me for dinner and offered to let me stay the night.”

“Oh.”

Jesus took a step closer to the house, “Daryl, I’m not sure I understand. Do you have an issue with me staying with Aaron?”

Daryl shook his head, “No. Ain’t none of my business. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Jesus gave him another quizzical look and said, “Goodnight, Daryl.”

Taking a deep breath, Daryl turned and went into the house. Careful not to touch anything lest he get it dirty, he headed straight for the room that Michonne had insisted that he occupy when he was in Alexandria. Since the house was one of those god awful mcmansions, it had its own bathroom. A luxury that Daryl rarely enjoyed. 

He probably needed a shower. Washing off in the sink was usually all he bothered with, but Michonne would give him the eye if she thought he didn’t take advantage of good clean wash water. If that didn’t work she’d have Rick chat with Daryl about it, and no, he did not want to have a conversation like that again.

The water did feel good. He let his mind wander to the problem at hand. Arguing over who would be involved with taking out the herd was stupid. Hell, they weren’t even talking about taking it out, just rerouting. They’d done it before, they could do it again. All this bitching and moaning was just wasting time that could be spent planning. 

His shower over, Daryl put on some clean clothes. He snorted. There was a time that he’d only had the clothes on his back, let alone a clean set. Now he had a whole dresser full. And that was just here in Alexandria. He had about as much at Sanctuary. Stupid.

The sun was low in the sky when Rick and Michonne finally got back. Dinner was pleasant that night with Rick producing some homemade beer that was the best thing Daryl had drunk in ages. They shared stories from the time before the safety and security of Alexandria. Times when they’d only survived by dumb luck or the helping hand of a now dead family member. 

Daryl would have happily sat in front of the fire and drank home brew with Rick until the wee hours, but Michonne gave Rick a look that even Daryl could understand. Daryl stayed up and stared at the fire for another hour before banking it and going to his bedroom. Tomorrow was going to be a hell of a day.

The next morning as he was getting ready, movement outside his window caught his eye. His hand went for a knife, but caught air because his knives were still laid out on the bed, waiting to be strapped on. It was just Jesus anyway, walking straight to Rick’s house. 

Daryl sighed and went to meet him at the front door. Jesus had his hand raised to knock and did an admirable job of not looking startled when Daryl jerked the door open. “Hi,” he said with a brilliant smile.

Daryl chose to ignore how pretty it made Jesus look when he smiled like that. “What?”

Jesus’s smile only faded a bit, “Aaron’s making breakfast and I was wondering if you wanted to tag along.”

“Nah, I’m just gonna grab some coffee.”

“Right. Well, the offer is open if you change your mind.” Daryl plainly heard the double offer, especially with Jesus looking at him with stars in his eyes.

Daryl shook his head and looked Jesus square in the eye. “I don’ think I’ll be changing my mind anytime soon. Thank you for the offer, but I’m good here.”

A beat and then, “Oh.” Jesus’s smile finally fell away. “Well, if that’s how it is. I’ll go back over to Aaron’s.”

“I’m sure Aaron enjoys your company.” 

The ‘more than me’ was left unspoken, but Jesus certainly heard it. He lifted his head, “I...I’ll see you around Daryl.” He turned and went down the stairs, his steps heavier than usual.

Daryl sighed again and looked across the field just as Rick and Michonne were coming back from taking Judith to school. He missed the days when the two of them were inseparable, just him and Rick out on runs, but he was willing to take what he could get now. Rick still had a pull that kept Daryl in his orbit, and nothing Daryl ever did kept him from circling around every time he was near Rick. 

***

Daryl had offered to take Jesus back to Hilltop, but Jesus wasn’t sure he was up to that emotional hot potato. He borrowed a horse instead. He left with reassurances from Rick that they would meet up with Maggie the next day to make a plan.

He’d been riding for at least an hour, the horse keeping a good pace despite the heat, when he passed a stray walker. He stopped long enough to poke it through the eye, not willing to spook the horse by kicking out. Really, at this point, killing one or two out on the road was no more taxing than smacking an annoying mosquito. It was when he started seeing groups of three and then four and then a dozen or more that he got concerned.

The horse, although trained how to react around the dead, was now starting to shy and snort. There were definitely too many for Jesus to try and get through on the horse on his own. If he were in a vehicle, it would be a different story, but the horse would get overwhelmed easily, and Jesus did not want to lose it. He turned the horse and headed back the way he came at a good clip, some of the walkers would follow them, but the horse could outpace them until they got to a good spot to stop. 

The one thing that was truly concerning was it was a much bigger problem than what they’d figured because either the herd was moving faster than they’d estimated, or there were a lot more than what he and Daryl had seen the other day from atop the hill. They were running out of time, and spending days figuring out how to get rid of the herd was no longer an option. Jesus wouldn’t even be able to get back to Hilltop now. He’d have to try and catch up with Daryl or just go back to Alexandria.

Somehow he ended up back in the spot he and Daryl had holed up in while they waited for the herd to pass and Daryl to fix the bike. He stopped the horse and listened. Really, he should go on, but the horse was blowing hard now and needed a break and probably some water and feed. 

He gave the horse her head to see if she would sniff out water, his eyes scanning the area for danger. Sure enough, after wandering behind the houses, she found a small creek that ran clear and clean. Jesus jumped off her back and filled his water bottle. He should probably boil it, but he’d drank from clear streams more and more over the last couple of years and had fewer and fewer problems. Either his body had adjusted, or there were less problems with the water with less humans about. 

The horse suddenly lifted her head and looked over her shoulder. Jesus looked to where she was focused and didn’t see anything, but after a moment he could hear it. A motorcycle. Specifically, Daryl’s motorcycle. 

Frowning, Jesus grabbed up the trailing lead for the horse and pulled her along back towards the road. Daryl should be almost to Sanctuary by now. There was no reason for Daryl to be coming back this way. Unless…

Jesus dropped the lead and ran between two houses towards the road. Daryl was just coming into view and swerved hard when he saw Jesus appear on the road. “Son of a bitch!” he hollered as he hopped off the falling bike.

“Oops.”

“Motherfucker, I’ll oops your ass,” Daryl threatened as he picked up his bike. “I just got it fixed from the last time.”

“While the thought of you ‘Oopsing’ my ass is appealing, we’ve got a bigger issue than your bike.”

“Yeah, what’s that?” Daryl asked.

“The herd has moved a lot more than what we expected and we’ll have to speed up our time line. Plus, I couldn’t get through them to get back to Hilltop.”

“Yeah, I ran into it too,” Daryl pushed his bike off the road and past where Jesus was standing to lean it up against the side of the house.  

Jesus inhaled softly and caught the scent of oil, Georgia pine, and Daryl’s slightly sweaty self. He closed his eyes and focused on feeling Daryl’s aura as he stood close.

“Quit it,” Daryl said softly.

“Sorry, couldn’t help myself,” Jesus said in defence, his eyes open now and staring at Daryl with no remorse.  

Daryl looked away, back the way he had come, “I was able to catch someone who was headed to Alexandria and told them to warn Rick and Michonne about the walkers. He’ll get everyone moving out in a few hours.”

Jesus knew the ‘he’ was Rick. It was always Rick. “He’s not going to be able to do this with just Alexandria. They’ve got the fewest fighters of all the communities. He’ll never be able to punch through and get to either Sanctuary or Hilltop.”

“You don’t know Rick.”

Jesus threw up his hands dramatically, “Oh right, Rick can do anything. Overcome every obstacle, surmount any mountain…”

“Shut up. You don’t have any idea what Rick Grimes is capable of,” Daryl said with a snarl.

“Clearly,” Jesus said with a snort. He turned and went back to where he’d left the horse. She was still dutifully waiting just behind the houses. He grabbed her lead and took her to the front of where Daryl was still standing by his bike.

“Look, I know that Rick Grimes is an amazing man and probably the most suited for life in this new world, but he’s just one man.” Jesus had one arm crossed over his stomach and the other gesturing broadly. “And anyway, it doesn’t matter, we need to get to Alexandria ourselves so that we can see what we can do to help. Every minute that we sit here and argue the merits of Rick Grimes is another minute those walkers get closer to Maggie and Hilltop.”

Daryl shook his head, “Got a herd of ‘em coming up behind me. We’re cut off.”

Jesus’ mouth fell open in shock. “How did that happen? We saw the end of the herd. Where did they come from?”   


“Dunno, don’t really matter now. They’re on the way, and we gotta get going to Hilltop.”

“Were you not listening? I had to turn back.”

“Maybe we can find another way, take the creek,” Daryl suggested.

“Does your bike float?”

“Dumbass, we can come back for it,” Daryl said as he headed between the houses to the creek.

Jesus gestured towards the bike, “You’re just going to leave it sitting here?”

Daryl stopped and turned to look at Jesus, “Move it if you’re so worried about it.”

Sighing deeply, Jesus gave up on the bike and followed Daryl, the horse trailing behind. 

They didn’t get far though, Daryl crouched down before he got to the creek, his fist raised up in the “wait” position. Jesus got down too and looked where Daryl’s steely gaze was pointed. It wasn’t good.

“Where are they coming from?” Jesus asked for the second time. 

Daryl just shook his head and crouched down and cautiously moved far enough that he felt comfortable and then stood back up. “We might be stuck here for a while.”

Jesus looked over his shoulder, “Can we try going north and looping around?”

“River’s up,” Daryl reminded him. 

“Shit, what are we going to do?” 

Daryl chewed his bottom lip, deep in thought. The sound of his teeth scraping over his stubble under his bottom lip loud where they stood between the houses. “We’ll just have to wait it out here.”

“No! I have to get back to Maggie!” 

“What do you think she did before you came along?” Daryl asked sharply. “You think she’s some weak woman who can’t do shit without a man? She’s been killing walkers as long as I’ve known her and she’s gonna be fine. And she’ll make sure everyone else is fine too.”  He started walking towards his bike, “Now come on, we need to find a place to hunker down until they pass.”

Jesus crossed his arms tightly around himself, looked upward and blew out a hard breath to try and calm himself. Daryl was right, but that didn’t mean he had to like it.

***

“Would you fucking quit pacing around?”

Jesus stopped mid stride and crossed his arms. “I’m worried about Hilltop.”

“I’m worried too, but pacing ain’t helping. And all we need is one of them assholes down there to catch sight of your shadow moving and we’ll have them beating down the door.”

Jesus dropped his arms sheepishly and went to where Daryl was looking out the window. They were on the second floor of one of the houses.  The owner had boarded up all the bottom floor windows and doors, so the only way in had been to get on the roof of the garage and shimmy over.

Daryl shuffled back to give Jesus his space. Or maybe it was to give himself space. Didn’t’ matter, Jesus was too close.

“Look at them. Some of them don’t look too decayed. Do you think a community got overrun or something?” Jesus asked.

Daryl peered out over Jesus’s shoulder and could pick out the ones that were older and the ones that seemed like they hadn’t been walkers long. “Doesn’t look like anyone we know.”

Jesus shifted from one foot to the other and bumped into Daryl. “Should we get a closer look? Could they be coming from Oceanside?”

“Nah, there’s guys in there too. Don’t need to risk going an’ looking.” Daryl stepped back from the window and looked around the bedroom they were in. There were other on rooms on this floor, but they were kids rooms. And whatever happened in those rooms when this house had fallen to the walkers did not look pretty. Neither one of them could stomach sleeping in a room with the horrors that happened then. 

“I got some jerky and some biscuits if you’re hungry,” Daryl said as he rummaged in his pack.

Jesus turned from the window, “I’ve got a couple of apples I think.”

“Sounds good.”

They ate their sparse meal in silence, both keeping quiet to listen to the movements of the walkers below them. Occasionally they’d hear a crash or some other noise that would remind them of how large the herd was.  A larger than normal crash close by had them jumping up to look out the window.

“Son of a bitch!” Daryl ground out as the horse broke free from the garage that they had hidden it in. Usually the horses didn’t get spooked, but a group of walkers had banged into the garage door and got it off its tracks. The horse wouldn’t stand a chance.

Jesus turned away, visibly wincing from the screams of the horse as it went down. 

“Maggie’s gonna be pissed about that horse.” Daryl said, emotionless.

“If Maggie is even around after this,” Jesus said, his jaw and fists clenched in anger. 

“Rick’ll…” 

“Oh, fuck Rick!” Jesus cried, turning to Daryl, his face contorted with his rage. “Rick isn’t some demigod that can swoop in to save the day!”

“Hey, you have no idea the things I’ve seen him do!” Daryl had every faith that Rick could get to Maggie in time. 

“Oh, right. The magic of Rick’s will to live.” Jesus threw his hands up in anger,  “I’ve heard all about it. Ad nauseum. But there is no way in hell that he can get through this fucking herd! There’s thousands of them.” 

“What is your fucking problem?” Daryl yelled back, Jesus had never said a word against Rick before today. 

“I’m tired of seeing you hero worship someone that only sees you as a tool.” 

Daryl stood straighter and pulled a lungful of air in through his nose, “You shut your fucking mouth.”

“No. You think no one can see you following after him like a fucking lap dog begging for scraps? Do you honestly think  _ Rick _ doesn’t see it? He counts on you to stay right there at his side, encourages it even.”

Daryl stepped into Jesus’s personal space, eyes flashing in anger, only a breath between them. “You shut your fucking mouth or I will shut it for you.” His voice low and menacing. 

Jesus turned away, undaunted by Daryl’s threat. “I can see it you know, the way that you look at him, the way that you hang on his every word. You love him. And he doesn’t love you back the same way.”

Daryl grabbed Jesus’s arm and jerked him around so that he was facing Daryl again, “You don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about,” he said as he squeezed Jesus’s arm hard enough to make the other man wince. No one was supposed to know how Daryl felt about Rick.

“Don’t I?” Jesus challenged. “You know that Rick can never love you the same way. But you still hold out, don’t you? Never taken a lover, never looked for someone else to love. Pathetic.”

Shaking Jesus hard, Daryl said, “It ain’t none of your business. You don’t know. He loves me like a brother.” Daryl could live with that, he had for years.

“Oh, well good for you,” Jesus said with a sneer as he pushed Daryl away. “Does that help you sleep at night? Does it make it feel better when you see him go to bed with Michonne?”

“Shut up! You don’t know!” Daryl tried to hide the panic in his voice. 

Jesus’s face crumbled, “Don’t I?”

Daryl turned away, he didn’t want to acknowledge what Jesus was confessing. “You...it’s not the same.”

“You're right. It’s not the same. The person I...love is actually available, but he’s so caught up in something he can’t have, he can’t see what’s right in front of him.”

“Doesn’t mean I want it.” Daryl said quietly, not looking at Jesus.

“Ouch.”

Daryl shrugged, he didn’t want to hurt Jesus. “Sorry. I…” 

Jesus narrowed his eyes, “You’re lying.”

“I’m not. I don’t need no one. And Rick may not love me like...like I love him, but he knows. Ok.”

“You think you’ll be cheating on Rick.”

Daryl didn’t say anything, just dropped his head. Leave it to Jesus to figure it all out. 

“Holy shit, you are so messed up, you know that. He fucking knows how you feel, and he, what, uses that to keep you loyal?”

“No!” Daryl screamed as he spun around, “He don’t.” Daryl headed for the door, “I need to get out of here.”

Jesus rushed to get between Daryl and the door, splaying himself across it. “There’s nowhere to go!”

Daryl reached for Jesus’s neck to jerk him out of the way, but his hand got tangled in hair that had fallen from Jesus’s bun and all he managed to do was plaster his body onto Jesus.

They stood there for a second, neither budging. Breath heaving and eyes boring into each others.

Jesus shifted his hips, eyes fluttering as his cock rubbed against Daryl’s jean clad thigh.

“Don’t,” Daryl whispered, trying to control himself.

“Please Daryl, I’m here. Right here in front of you.”

Daryl’s head fell. “I don’t...I don’t feel that way about you.”

Jesus swallowed hard, “You could, if you let yourself. I know you’re attracted to me. I see it.” His voice became pleading, “It...it doesn’t have to be more than tonight.”

Daryl turned his head, too much emotion swirling in his mind, “That’s not fair to you.”

“I can live with it,” Jesus said, his voice quiet and slightly broken. 

Daryl looked at him again, saw the way that Jesus was looking at him. “How can you do that?”

Jesus shrugged, “Isn’t it what you do?”

“Oh.”

Smiling sadly, Jesus put his hands on Daryl’s hips and pulled him closer, “Just let’s have tonight.”

Daryl dipped his head, lips hovering over Jesus’s. “I can’t,” he said as he pushed himself away. He could hear Jesus groan in frustration, but Daryl did his best to ignore it as he looked out the window to gauge how the herd was getting along. They’d been too loud just now and could have given themselves away to the walkers. 

The light was fading, but Daryl could still see countless heads bobbing along, some stopping to feed on the carcass of the dead horse, more focused on that than the noise from the house. They were lucky, though they were still going to be stuck here all night. Daryl was as frustrated as Jesus about it, but there was nothing they could do. 

His musings were disturbed by the sound of Jesus pushing a dresser in front of the door. “Making sure I don’t get away?” Daryl asked, half joking.

Jesus snorted, “No, but I’d rather not be awoken by a bunch of walkers crashing through the door.”

Daryl shook his head, “We couldn’t even get in here without crawling through a second story window, I don’t know what you’re worried about.”

“Just being extra precautious.”

“Right.”

“Look, I want to be able to take my boots off and air out my feet,” Jesus said as he sat on the side of the bed and started untying his laces.

Daryl looked down at his feet. He liked taking his boots off to sleep too. He could remember having weeks on end when he’d had to wear his boots night and day. But that was years ago, back when they walked from Georgia to Virginia. 

“I’ll take first watch,” he said.

“Just go to bed, Daryl. There’s no way anyone is going to get in here without waking us up. And there’s no need to watch out for the horse anymore.”

Daryl turned to tell Jesus it was far too early to sleep, but was thrown off by the sight of him taking his shirt off. Swallowing hard, he asked, “I thought you were going to just take your boots off.”

“I’m hot.” Was all Jesus said, not bothering to look at Daryl as he shucked his pants and just stood there in a a pair of black boxer briefs. 

“Well, I’m not tired.” Daryl just managed to not stare at Jesus’s tight body. It was nothing like Rick’s, paler and not nearly as hairy, but it was still a man’s body.

“Fine, try not to wake me up when you do decide to go to bed.” Jesus flopped into the bed, pulled a sheet over himself, and rolled over with his back to Daryl.

Daryl blew out a long breath and went back to watching the dead roil like a sea of decayed flesh.

***

Jesus tried to sleep. But all he could think about was that he’d laid his heart on the line and Daryl had pushed it away. It wasn’t the first time he’d been rejected by Daryl, but it was the most vehement. 

Daryl was stubborn and couldn’t see that if he’d just open his heart to someone besides Rick, he could be happy. It was plain to see to anyone who knew Daryl that he had massive amounts of love to give, and it was wasted on a person that would never give it back. 

He could hear Daryl shuffling around behind him. Staying close to the window and keeping watch. It was full dark now, Daryl probably couldn’t see much of anything. But he was going to stay at that window anyway. That was like Daryl, sacrificing his comfort for others. 

Sighing softly to himself, Jesus closed his eyes and let the sounds of the walkers lull him to sleep. He was exhausted with worry for Maggie and his bruised heart. His breath evened out and he relaxed all his muscles. Tomorrow they could go and see about Maggie.

He was awoken by the creak and dip of the bed. Jesus was on his side, turned away from where Daryl was slipping in the bed.

“Sorry,” Daryl whispered as he crawled under the sheet. 

“S’okay,” Jesus mumbled. “Thought you were gonna keep watch?”

“Couldn’t see anymore and it sounds like they stopped for the night.” Daryl replied as he punched the pillow under his head into a shape he liked.

“Okay. Just try not to snore.”

“Pft, you’re the one who was snorin’,” Daryl said with mock indignation.

Jesus rolled over with a huff, “I do not snore!”

Daryl was laying on his back, eyes closed and hands clasped on his chest. He’d taken off his jacket and outer shirt and was just in a thin t-shirt that looked gray in the semi-darkness. “Whatever, I was awake and could hear ya.”

“I’ve been  _ told _ by several people that I don’t snore. So you are just trying to piss me off.” The sheet had slipped down and pooled around Jesus’ hip.

Opening his eyes, Daryl looked at Jesus, his eyes flicking over his chest before meeting his eyes. “Was Aaron one of ‘em that told you that?”

“What?” 

Daryl rubbed a hand over his face, “Nevermind. Ain’t none of my business.” He rolled over, presenting his back to Jesus.

Jesus sat up, “No, no, no. You don’t get to do that.” He tugged on Daryl’s shoulder so he could look at his face.

Letting Jesus pull him around, Daryl looked at him and said, “Look, I’m sorry, alright. Ain’t none of my business.”

“You’re not jealous are you?” 

Biting his lip, Daryl shrugged his shoulder, “I ain’t your boyfriend.”

Jesus slumped down in the bed and flung an arm over his face, unable to look at Dary. “You could be you know. I mean, it doesn’t have to be something permanent or something out in the open. I know how you feel about...well, I know how you feel.”

“I wish you could understand. It’s not that you’re not… You ain’t ugly and you’re alright to talk to, but…” Daryl sighed loudly. “It would feel wrong.”

“Wrong how? As in gay? Or cheating on Rick?” Jesus sat up suddenly, “You know what, I don’t care. I’m going to check on the walkers.” He was out of bed and across the room in three quick steps. 

Daryl rubbed a hand across his face before getting up and following Jesus to the window. The walkers all stood there, slightly swaying, but otherwise not moving. “They ain’t moved an inch. Fucking weird how they just stand there.”

Jesus crossed his arms, his lip curled up in a sneer, “Very weird. Stuck in one place for no reason. Waiting for something that won’t ever happen maybe?”

“Man, why the fuck can’t you let it go? I done told ya, I’m fine with the way things are.” Daryl turned away from the widow and paced around the room, his steps fast and short.

“That’s all well and good for you, and probably Rick too, but it doesn’t work for me. I’m not fine with the way things are.”

“Just let it go,” Daryl huffed. “Find someone else. Ain’t Aaron willin’?”

“Oh, that would make it so easy for you wouldn’t it? You could go on pining for Rick and pretend there isn’t someone standing right in front of you that loves yo…”

“Rick loves me!”

“Really? So why does he fuck Michonne?”

Daryl took two big steps and was standing toe to toe with Jesus, his fists curled and arms up, “You shut your fucking mouth.”

Jesus didn’t flinch, just stared back at Daryl with a steely glint in his eye, “Oh, here we go again. I’m not scared of you Daryl. You can’t intimidate me like you do everyone else.”

Growling low in his throat, Daryl leaned in so that he was nearly touching Jesus. 

“I think we’ve been here before Daryl,” Jesus said calmly. He nodded his head in the direction of the door, “Right over there in fact.”

Daryl closed his eyes, “What are you doing to me?” he breathed out.

“I’m not doing anything to you, Daryl. I’m merely offering you everything that I have to give, if only you’d take it.”

Clenching his eyes tightly, Daryl shook his head, “Ain’t fair to you, I can’t…”

“Daryl,” Jesus’ voice didn’t break, but it was a near thing, “I know. I know that you’d never really be mine, but let me have what your able to give. I can accept that.”

“It’d only hurt you.”

“It hurts already.”

“ _ Fuck. _ ”

Jesus smiled, “Please do.”

And just like that, the switch was flipped. 

Daryl’s mouth was hungry as it devoured Jesus’, nipping and sucking at every bit of lip and tongue that he could. Moaning and rucking up against Jesus, whatever reservations he’d had finally gone. 

Jesus wrapped his arms around Daryl and pulled their bodies flush, his hard cock rubbing the inside of Daryl’s thigh, and Daryl’s finding a place above Jesus’ waistband. They fit, probably not the way that Daryl would have fit with Rick, they were nearly the same height, but it still felt right to Jesus.

“Bed,” he said to Daryl between kisses.

Daryl agreed, and lifted Jesus in his arms and carried him the few steps to the bed. Jesus slid out of his embrace to fall across the bed, chest heaving and eyes dark with desire. “You are fucking amazing, you know that?”

“Shut up,” Daryl said with a snort. He bit his lip, staring at Jesus awkwardly. His eyes roved over Jesus’ body, all smooth lines and sharp corners. His muscles were long and lean, and they all seemed to center  under his boxer briefs where the hard outline of his dick drew Daryl’s eyes like a magnet. 

“Take some clothes off, Daryl.”

Nodding, Daryl slid his pants down his hips, revealing his lack of underclothes. “Damn, you go around commando all the time?” Jesus asked.

Daryl shrugged, “Keeping clean underwear ain’t easy.”

“That’s why I wear black.” Jesus kept his eyes on Daryl as he slipped his boxer briefs down and let his own hard cock spring free.

“Fuck,” Daryl whispered.

“You keep saying that, and yet, you are still standing there and I am alone in this bed.”

“Smartass.”

“Can...can we stop talking and actually do the thing now? You have no idea how long I’ve been waiting.” Jesus was sure he would bust open if Daryl didn’t start touching him, and soon.

Daryl smacked Jesus’ foot lightly before crawling into bed with him. He was going to say something, but Jesus pulled his head down and gave him a passionate kiss to stop him from saying whatever dumb thing he was going to say.

Jesus wasn’t a passive lover. His hands were all over Daryl, rubbing, pinching, and generally touching every spot of skin that he could. Daryl wouldn’t let Jesus under his shirt, but it didn’t matter. Just touching something he never thought he’d be allowed to touch was enough.

He’d never really felt short, or small, but with Daryl sprawled across him, it felt like Daryl had him caged in, his hips straddled Jesus and his elbows were resting on either side of his head. Dark hair curtained them off from the rest of the world as Daryl focussed all his attention on Jesus. Thick fingers threaded through Jesus’ hair, making him gasp.

“You like that?” Daryl whispered, his voice low and rough.

“Yes,” Jesus all but moaned.

Daryl tightened his fingers, pulling hard enough to make Jesus’ hips jerk. “You do like that,” Daryl said with a soft chuckle.

“You might get me off just by that.”

“Hmmm.” Daryl twisted the hair tighter around his hand, jerking Jesus’ head back in the process and making him hiss.

“Fuck, Daryl.”

“Gonna in a minute.”

“Shit, yeah there’s lu...Holy shit!” Jesus lost all control as Daryl bit the spot just under his ear and worried the tendon there with his tongue. He couldn’t talk anymore, just whine low in his throat as Daryl slowly turned him into a pile of goo.

He was hard and leaking by this point, beyond the point of rational thought, but he still wanted more. “Please,” he whispered, rubbing himself shamelessly against Daryl, desperate for Daryl to touch his cock.

“Where’d you say that lube was?” Daryl whispered in his ear, sending a shiver through Jesus’ body.

“It’s a… it’s in my jacket. The inside pocket, the one on the left side, up high.”

Daryl left him to search for the jacket, finding it laid over the chair. He took a minute to peek out the window, “Still just standin’ there,” he said.

“I really don’t care what they are doing as long as they aren’t coming in here at the moment,” Jesus replied.

Daryl was still rifling through pockets, “Fuck, how many pockets do you have?”

Jesus rolled over and propped his head up on his hand, drinking in the sight of Daryl standing nearly naked. “I lost count, but you should be careful. I’m not sure how many have knives in them.”

Daryl snorted and dropped the jacket in a heap, holding up a small bottle of lube, “Found it.”

“Don’t just stand there, come here!” Jesus beckoned with his sweet smile and beautiful body.

“You good?” Daryl asked as he slipped into the bed beside Jesus.

Jesus took the bottle of lube from Daryl, “I’m great.” He opened the cap and drizzled a good bit on his fingers.

Daryl looked like he wanted to watch, but instead went back to worrying along Jesus’ neck.

“Fuck, Daryl,” Jesus moaned.

He could feel that Daryl was ready, hard and hot, making a mess of Jesus’ neck as he bided his time waiting.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck. I’m ready.” 

Giving one more hard bite, making Jesus cry out, Daryl shifted in the bed. “How you want to do this?”

Jesus grabbed Daryl’s dick and slicked it with extra lube, testing out its size and shape, “Hmm, I’d say on my knees.”

Daryl grunted and sat up to give Jesus room to shift up to his hands and knees. His hand wandered along Jesus’ back and down to the curve of his ass and then back up again. Fingers touching each vertebra along the way.

Jesus jerked his hips back. “Daryl, love. Please, today.”

Snorting, Daryl lightly smacked Jesus on the ass. “Impatient little shit.”

“I’m fun size!”

Daryl shook his head and then teased a finger into Jesus.

“Damn, said I was ready,” he whined.

“Just wanna check and see what I’m gettin’ myself into.”

“Wow.”

Daryl patted around on the bed until he found the lube and added some to his hand, “Hold on to  that wow,” he said as he slicked himself up again. 

Not wasting anymore time, Daryl lined up and pushed. 

“Jesus, fuck!” Jesus cried.

“More like, ‘Daryl, fuck’, but whatever,” Daryl replied as he continued to work his way into Jesus.

Daryl stilled and waited until Jesus wiggled and moaned for more. He was slow at first, clearly enjoying the feel of Jesus’ sweet grip. But Jesus wasn’t having it, and started to increase the rhythm by pushing back.

“You’re throwin’ me off!” Daryl hollered.

“Go faster then!” Jesus hollered back.

“If I’da known you were so mouthy during sex…”.

“Please, you like it and you know it.”

Daryl wrapped an arm around Jesus’ middle and jerked him up and then put a hand over his mouth, “Hush,” Daryl whispered in his ear and then bit down gently, not once losing his momentum. 

“Mpf,” Jesus replied. His back was arched, his head and hips the only thing touching Daryl. 

Daryl still had one hand over Jesus’ mouth, but the other one had drifted down to his new lover’s hard cock and was pumping it in time to his thrusts. Sweat dripped off Daryl to splash onto Jesus and mixed with the sweat already running down Jesus’ back.

He worked Jesus relentlessly, keeping in time to his own thrusts, so much so that it took Jesus biting him to get his attention.. “What the fuck, man!”

Jesus spit out Daryl’s hand, “I’m about five seconds from coming, either come now or leave my cock alone.”

Daryl snorted and gave Jesus a squeeze, “Go ahead, Don’t wait on me.”

“It’s better..ahhh...it’s better when we come together.” Jesus said, gasping as his cock was held tighter.

“Maybe,” Daryl said, his words hot in Jesus’ ear, “But I want to feel you from the inside.”

Jesus huffed out a breath and let his head tip back further, “Fine, then. Fuck me until I come.”

Growling low in his throat, Daryl began again, his hand working Jesus until they were lost to all but each other, the only sounds they heard were their own heartbeats.

As much as Jesus had complained, it was Daryl that came first, his whole body shivering through his orgasm as he quietly cried out. His hand on Jesus only faltered for a moment before he helped Jesus to finish. 

Sweaty and out of breath, they fell over in a heap. Jesus blindly searched on the floor for something to wipe with and came up with something that felt like a t-shirt. After cleaning up, they wrapped themselves up in the blanket and went to sleep. The low sounds of the walkers outside like an apocalyptic lullaby.

***

Daryl was already up and looking out the window when Jesus woke. “Still have our guests?”

“Nah,” Daryl said with a shake of his head. “Got new company now.”

Fearing some of Negan’s stragglers or worse, Jesus jumped out of bed and looked out the window, not caring his was completely naked. Down below he saw a group of Alexandrians, Rick among them. 

“Oh.” He really couldn’t hide the disappointment in his voice.

“Been thinking about what you said,” Daryl’s eyes weren’t on Rick, but further away to where Michonne was just coming out of one of the other houses. “He’d never do something that would hurt Michonne. And I wouldn’t want him to.” He paused to chew on his lip and acknowledge Michonne’s wave with a short upward nod of this head, “Ain’t doin’ nobody any good living like a monk just ‘cause...just cause Rick ain’t ever gonna…” Daryl shrugged his shoulder and looked at Jesus, “Stupid not to see what’s right in front of me.”

“Oh,” Jesus said again.

Daryl turned away from Jesus and headed towards the bedroom door. “Best get your clothes on, unless you want Michonne to see. She’s on her way up.”

“Shit,” Jesus dove for his pants and hurriedly dressed as he heard Michonne come up the stairs.

***

Aaron’s heart did a little flip when he saw Jesus and Daryl come out of the house. He thought for sure the herd had gotten them as well as the horse. But it looked liked they’d found a good spot to hole up for the night. Something caught his eye. Yes, Jesus definitely looked a bit glowy. A glance at Daryl showed that he did too. Aaron couldn’t help but smirk. Good for them. 

Beside him he heard Rick grunt. Aaron turned to him and saw the look on his face, not really anger, more disbelief and disappointment. And a fair bit of jealousy. Sighing, Aaron stepped in front of Rick and caught his eye.

“I’m glad the two of them made it. Looks like they work well together.”

Rick’s eyes darted around Aaron, seeking Daryl. “Yeah, they sure looked like they  _ worked _ together a bit too well.” 

Aaron tilted his head to catch Rick’s eye, imitating Rick’s own mannerism, “I think it’s a good thing, don’t you?”

Meeting Aaron’s eyes, Rick was silent for several breaths, the sounds of Michonne, Jesus, and Daryl talking about the herd just out of earshot. “Daryl and I always work well together.”

“You did, and you do. But now you got Michonne to work with. And Jesus seems to really like working with Daryl. And I can’t see how that could be a problem since you got Michonne now. And you know, Daryl doesn’t seem to mind you working with Michonne, does he?”

Rick gritted his teeth and looked over at Daryl again, “I guess not.”

Aaron stepped out of Rick’s way, “Daryl wouldn’t ever give up on working with you, not ever. But, Jesus seems suited to do it now. And I think it’s a beautiful thing.”

Rick didn’t have a chance to say anything else, as Jesus walked up to them, “Man, that was crazy. All the dead just stopped right in the road. Couldn’t see the beginning or the end of them. We didn’t want to spook them, so we just holed up for the night.”

Aaron smiled and glanced between Jesus and where Daryl was walking towards them, “Looks like the two of you got on ok.”

Jesus smiled slyly at Aaron, “We did at that. Can’t wait to do it again, as a matter of fact.”

Rick was already walking away, his steps determined as he made a beeline for Daryl.

“I bet,” Aaron said with a smile, not missing the quick glance that Daryl gave Jesus.

Jesus turned to look at Daryl as well, everyone was looking at Daryl now, Michonne included, but he was only looking at Jesus.

**Author's Note:**

> How was that? I started writing this way back at the beginning of the season 9 and it's been slow going! I expected this to be done a long time ago! 
> 
> I went back and forth about showing the family fighting off and rerouting the dead, but really, this fic wasn't about that. We all know they beat them back and shifted them away from everyone. 
> 
> I truly appreciate every comment and kudo! Thank you so much for reading!


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